I am a survivor of abuse. I have post traumatic stress disorder. I will flinch and fear you when you’ve done nothing wrong to me. If you get angry at the dog, I cry. If you slam the door yelling at the neighbor, I hide in my room.
I cower down in fear and hold up my arms and say “I’m afraid of you, please don’t hit me!” and yet, you have never hit me before…. and you probably won’t. But that’s what happens when you are a survivor of abuse with PTSD.
I run away.
I have even become so fearful that I’ve devised the murder plot in my own mind that was (I convinced myself) being planned by the person I live with and his friends. When I became distant, and he asks me what was the matter it sounded ridiculous for me to say, “I thought you were going to murder me!”
But I did.
Am I insane? Am I crazy? Am I completely off my rocker? I don’t think so. I have issues. I have problems to deal with. I have PTSD, Battered Women’s Syndrome, I am a survivor of abuse, and I am like this because someone made me this way.
Somebody else made me like this…. afraid…
Don’t hit. If you are abusing someone, stop, get help. If you are getting abused, get help.
Or you may end up like me… and its tragic to live life in fear …
